it's the first 30 deg day since summer for the year. honestly, where has the time gone? i am left with vague recollections, fleeting moments from a memory here and there, but i don't know what i've done with myself this year.
and i know i shouldn't, but summer beckons and remains just out of reach oh so elusively. three more exams, three more exams. i'll be lounging around before i know it.
i made a list of some of the things i want to do in summer, so that i won't find myself starting the next school term the same way i feel now. so here goes; my summer checklist, ten things i want to do before summer's over.
1. Learn Canto
2. Exercise
3. Learn the guitar (or attempt to)
4. Watch LOTS of TV - asian dramas, catch up on seasons of lost, start watching flash forward, vampire diaries, etc.
5. Facials :)
6. Get a really awesome haircut. begone split ends!!
7. Bake and practice some of the stuff i learnt at planetcake. i have the book now, so i just need to buy the tools. ooh, i'm going to make lots of smoothies and ice chocolates and ice coffees :D
8. have lazy park days and lazy beach days.
9. read (books & non-intellectually stimulating material like trashy magazines included)
10. catch up with friends

=]

just a random question, but what makes a good girlfriend? i was thinking the other day that it's all quite easy to say "oh that person's a good boyfriend" but yeah.. what are the qualities that make a good girlfriend?

sometimes i wish i was a dog. watching piffy bounding around today for no reason in particular (yes, he bounds like a rabbit - i have no idea why) it occurred to me that he is just purely exuberant by nature. if only i could be like that. go around wagging my tail all day and just flopping on my belly to get a kind scratch.

i can't believe how apathetic i've become to the whole idea of exams. i still get stressed and the first thing that comes to mind when i wake up on an exam morning is "shit" (i duno. it's my first literal thought, but somehow when i go to exams in the morning i always need to poo... oookay TMI) but yeah, one semester later it's like those thoughts never happened, because i find myself in the exact same spot, stressing and shitting myself. -__-

so exam period is well and truly under way. 1 down, 3 to go. please please please let me get through this. i promise i'll be more hardworking next semester.

if there's a will, there's a way

in light of the storm i've just barely managed to weather in the past month, i've met some really inspiring people in the last two days. lately i've really struggled with the concept of trying - how hard is too hard? and is it the decision to forge onwards that makes us better, or the knowing of when to let go when something is beyond our reach?

sydney was a great getaway for me, even though it was only for a day. my favourite time was sitting at the wharf in Balmain waiting for the ferry. the sun was just setting, the waters were clear and even though it was a tad chilly, it just felt peaceful sitting on the deck watching the clouds form. for a moment, exams were far far away. it was just the clouds drifting lazily overhead in a bright blue sky. my arms ached (i'd just grappled for six hours with a 5kg beast of a cake) and i'd been on my feet all day, but it was so calming.

i really enjoyed the cake course - i expected it to be challenging (and it was) but it was actually a lot harder than i thought it would be. my cake was looking pretty dismal at times but thankfully some of the planetcake people helped me and it looked pretty decent at the end, even though i was rushing to finish. i felt this huge rush of accomplishment that i'd acquired a new skill (it's been a loooong time since i've learnt a new practical skill) and i love how it's a job where you get paid to be creative, and to do something you love, and it's always for the occassion of celebrating something - birthday, wedding, christening, etc. :) i'm quite inspired to do all the other courses in time. maybe one or two a year if i can afford them. :D

anyway, the taxi driver i met was really interesting. he'd gotten married at 23 and his wife was 18 then, and they had their first kid at that age. a lot of people don't believe in marrying early but he was adamantly supportive of it - he kept saying 'it's beautiful. you grow up together' as opposed to 'meeting at 30, you're already your own person'. which is true, i've never thought about it that way but he was clearly so proud of his family and so happy and it was just really inspiring. we asked him if it was difficult to be married and supporting children that young, but he scoffed and said 'nah man, if there's a will there's a way'

:)

i think i'll stop blogging now. exams exams.

intention vs action

Love is shown in your deeds, not your words - Fr. Jerome Cunnings
Words show a man's wit, but action his meaning - Benjamin Franklin
Words should be used as a tool for communication and not as a substitute for action - Anon

bottom line: words are cheap.

and yet, uttered by the right people, they have the power to hurt you.

why is it that i am blessed with the attention span of a goldfish?? seriously. i've been thinking for awhile now that it's something that i will eventually grow out of - i mean, you don't see 20 year old working adults or something who can't sit still or stop fidgeting. for some reason this mysterious ability to concentrate seems to have passed me by.

i am bored, and that usually ends up with me changing my hair color or something. i think my hair can't keep up with my moods cos lately the ends have started to look knotty and bedraggled =[

i hope you dance

lately sleep has been really off. i have trouble falling asleep although i'm drained, and when i do finally sleep i have these really weird vivid dreams that are quite in sync with reality. which results in me waking up confused and disoriented, and not quite sure what stuff has actually happened and what hasn't. it's making me cranky :(

my grand plan to study has failed.

i watched fame and i wish i was talented.